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Ball Four Quotes (2)

"My great roomie, Bob Lasko, has led me down the trail of sin and perdition and gotten me smashed on mai tais (pronounced 'my ties'). This is a Hawaiian drink brewed by the evil gods of the volcanos and no potion for a clean-cut American boy like me."

"[Seattle Pilots GM] Mavin Milkes is a a guy who will not sit around in a situation that calls for panic."

On a trip to Oakland, Bouton and fellow pitcher Gary Bell visit the Berkeley campus: "Gary and I are the crazy ones. I mean we're concerned about getting the Oakland Athletics out. We're concerned about making money in real estate, and about ourselves and our families. These kids, though, are genuinely concerned about what is going on around them. They're concerned about Vietnam, poor people, black people. They're concerned about the way things are and they're going to change them. What are Gary and I doing besides watching? ... So I wanted to tell everybody, 'Look I'm with you, baby. Underneath my haircut I really understand that you're doing the right thing.'"

"The sad truth about baseball, I'm afraid, is that there is not enough in it to occupy a man's mind."

"By and large nobody is serious about these baseball fights except the two guys who start them ... Here came Fritz running toward me. He was laughing his head off and we grabbed each other and started waltzing like a couple of bears.... 'How's your wife,' I said, 'You can give me a fake punch in the ribs.' ' She's fine,' he said. 'You can punch me in the stomach, not too hard.'.... The most interesting thing about the fight was Houk's reaction to the police who came on the field to break it up. When he saw them he went out of his skull. 'What are the cops doing on the field?... I've never seen cops on the field before. They ought to be at the university where they belong.'"

"Last night [manager Joe Shultz] got thrown out of the game for the first time for disputing a home run that everyone knew was foul except the umpires. But that's not what he got thrown out for. He got thumbed out for offering the plate umpire his glasses..."

"On the way to the ballpark tonight Ray Oyler, sitting in the back of the bus during a bumpy ride, discovered an erection. He promptly offered to buy the bus from the driver."



April 2019



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